Oh those knives

The original name for this story was going to be called “Over again” but when I read it to my teacher he said that I should change the name to “oh those knives”.
Alright here’s the start:
It seems like I don’t have a real purpose here on Earth, alive.
But other people swear that I do. Which makes a small amount of sense. Even though no one really has a purpose, everyone wants everyone around, to stay.

Don’t you get sick to your stomach when you think of that person leaving your life? Or earth..
Just anyone really, it wouldn’t fully be the same would it?
Even if I felt like giving up (which I obviously don’t hah.. cough) it would be selfish of me to remove myself from this pointless life.

I say pointless because I’m an “eDgY TeEnAgEr wHo WiLl ReBeL” or cause I’m weird. Or both. A lot of the time life feels meaningful but also really pointless.

Everything keeps happening over and over again. Not much really changes.
I wake up and get my stretches done to either go to class or get the day over with. Waiting for my night to end so I could do the same exact thing the next day.
Run into the same people, go to the same kitchen with those same knives.. oh those knives.
I don’t know what I’m talking about because my life could be viewed as perfect compared to other lives. I have it good.
I’m not complaining. Everything just seems to repeat over and over again to the point where it’s just.. meaningless.

Going to the same two graveyards with the same few people. One to hangout in, sometimes smoke at. And the other for.. let’s say for my boyfriend. -hey mom, im kidding.

I guess I have to live with the boring parts of existence to experience the good parts.

Life isn’t as bad as my brain makes it out to be.
Like I said, compared to all the other lives around me, my life is great.
It’s just my mental that messes with me. Ruins me, you could say.
It’s my fault that I think like this, it’s actually other people’s fault but I should have controlled it, I guess..

Life is good. It’s just my brain that makes me not realize that.

Now it’s time to repeat…